I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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