My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
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