Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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