D3 body, D1 cock
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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