would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize