WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
