I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
