I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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