i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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