I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Are my feet made of real feet?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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