kristin has been a bad kristin
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
