why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
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