Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
