Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
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