Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
