So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
