If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
