like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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