return my video game
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
