Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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