I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize