True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize