Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
