i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
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