When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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