Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize