He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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