She is in my trunk
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
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