pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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