just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
