opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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