these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Randomize