is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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