we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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