i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
