its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
