At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
