I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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