Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
