worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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