Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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