He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
