how can u be prego again
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
