i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
