Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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