What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize