There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Found the puke drawer
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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