Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
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