Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize