it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize