she was so not down for the gang bang
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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