she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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