He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
